Anyone can suffer from a mental health condition, even 'mental health professionals'.
Many are brought into the profession due their personal experiences, and a desire to help others in the same way. However, our lived experiences can also make us more vulnerable to stress and/or vicarious trauma, while also trying to navigate through the complexities and demands of a collapsing mental health system. My ultimate goal is still to help others overcome any distress or pain they may be having, by creating a service that complements the NHS system, in a way that works for everyone involved.
My mental health:
Just like millions of people in the world, I also have a mental health condition that affects my day-to-day living. It has taken me almost 13 years to find a balance, and I am always looking for new techniques and strategies to help me minimise my symptoms, improve my quality of life, and achieve goals that I once thought was out of my reach.
I had my first (formal) breakdown at the age of 17, and ended up in children and adolescent ward for 7 months, shortly after taking my final GCSE exams. My admission changed the direction of my life, and thankfully for the better!
On the other hand, the warning signs were there for at least 2 years prior, when I had sought help from my GP at the time at 15, but I was dismissed because I was not experiencing suicidal thoughts or actively self-harming due to my symptoms. I can't help but think how differently my life could have turned out if I was given something, whether it be talking therapy or the medication I desperately needed at the time.
My experiences make me really passionate about treating people early on, at the first signs of illness, preventing them from falling into crisis entirely. Environmental risk factors such as childhood adverse experiences, extreme stress due to difficult life circumstances, self-medication using drugs and alcohol, and poor nutrition, increase the risk of developing psychosis, or genetic diseases such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, contributing to health inequalities we see today in society. Everyday, people young and old are taking their own lives because of the lack of access to the support they need, and I want to be a part of the solution, rather than become part of the problem.
Things that helped me:
CAMHS inpatient unit: Being away from home and in a supportive environment, taking medication, having art therapy sessions 2x a week, cognitive behavioural therapy also 2x a week, partaking in fun activities and exposing myself to new experiences, and being around people with similar struggles - knowing that I was not alone. This was an intense experience, and really helped me find joy again.
CAMHS cognitive behavioural therapy / dialectal behavioural therapy in a community setting: Helped me adjust back in the community before I turned 18, and learn new coping skills, but it was also a difficult time, because therapy brings up a lot of difficult emotions brought on by reliving painful memories, and I was also self-medicating with alcohol - doesn't react well with medication!
Adult mental health services: I received short-term support on and off over the years. I benefited the most during and after pregnancy, when I really needed the support, in the form of weekly home visits and counselling for the first three months of my son's life.
Private Audiologist session: Learned new coping skills to manage my sensitivities to sound, and learning why my current techniques were making my symptoms worse in the long-term.
Private art therapy sessions: Expressing my darkest thoughts through my oil pastel drawings and poetry, similar to what I have done in the past, helped me distract myself from the distress I was experiencing, and analyse my thoughts and feelings.
Time: Growing from painful situations builds resilience. Over the years, I have increased my faith in myself, that I will overcome whatever issues I may be facing at that moment, by seeking help from family, friends, mental health professionals, and being truly honest about what I was feeling, identifying what the causes are, and finding another way forward.
Working in Mental health services:
As a nursing student, I often saw how adults were constantly being let down by community mental health services, often referred to services by their GP, hopeful that their situations will change if support is offered to them, only to be disappointed to find out that the best that can be offered is medication, and/or to be placed on a 1-5 year wait list for therapy, and a swift discharge back into the care of their GP if they are currently deemed to be 'stable'.
Things aren't much better on adult mental health wards either, these beds are usually reserved for people acutely psychotic, in environments where violence and aggression is rife, and the effectiveness of treatment and care provided is debatable. Once patients are discharged back in the community services, being checked on once a month by their care-coordinator, the count-down begins for when they admitted back into hospital again.
Patients deserve better than a fire-fighting service, that only offers help when it's almost too late. This is why I have developed my mental health coaching service, it is not perfect, but can be really beneficial for the right people who are ready to change the direction of their lives.